Our Town Presents Your Guide to the Cox Digital Cable Additional Channels
Some of you compulsive channel surfers may have noticed that flipping through the 200s took a little longer than usual this weekend. That's because Cox added a slew of new channels to their lineup! Here's your guide to making the most of the new choices.
213: TECHNO-TIME
DESCRIPTION: Get your gadget on with greatest coverage of all the latest techno-toys!
FOR: Working class papas will drool over the gizmos they can never have! The rich can order the things they will never use!
UNFORTUNATELY: A disturbing lack of nerd babes. Not a fine rack to be found among the bunch unless you count "HelpFiles" host Larry DeStefano.
249: BUON GIORNIO!
DESCRIPTION: Get a taste of the old country, with imported Italian soaps, talk shows and soccer games. (Little hint--they call soccer "football!")
FOR: Immigrants, Italian students.
UNFORTUNATELY: The grease factor is through the roof.
253: TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER
DESCRIPTION: Old science fiction movies and television shows all day and all night (except for 1-7 AM, where you can order some of the finest kitchen and home fitness equipment on the market today!)
FOR: Losers, geeks tired of Techno-Time, nerds.
UNFORTUNATELY: The station was recently bought out by Viacom and there is talk of retooling it as a station centered around crops.
269: FASHIONABLE HOME DESIGNS
DESCRIPTION: See the latest in architecture, interior design and construction by touring some of the most fashionable houses in the northeast and west (no Midwest coverage for obvious reasons)
FOR: Families in bland cookie-cutter suburban wastelands (looking at you, Maple Street!) who want to live vicariously through those with taste.
UNFORTUNATELY: Though she comes across perfectly nice on TV, you just know leading personality Meredith Ireland is a raging b-i-t-c-h in real life, pardon our French.
280: FREEKY TV
DESCRIPTION: All the latest in rap and hip hop music, urban fashion and other gritty trends, YO! WORD UP!
FOR: Aspiring thugs/sluts, "wiggers."
UNFORTUNATELY: Poisons youth. Our advice is to place this one in between your Playboy TV, Showtime and VH1 on your "BLOCK ALL PROGRAMS" list.
Some of you compulsive channel surfers may have noticed that flipping through the 200s took a little longer than usual this weekend. That's because Cox added a slew of new channels to their lineup! Here's your guide to making the most of the new choices.
213: TECHNO-TIME
DESCRIPTION: Get your gadget on with greatest coverage of all the latest techno-toys!
FOR: Working class papas will drool over the gizmos they can never have! The rich can order the things they will never use!
UNFORTUNATELY: A disturbing lack of nerd babes. Not a fine rack to be found among the bunch unless you count "HelpFiles" host Larry DeStefano.
249: BUON GIORNIO!
DESCRIPTION: Get a taste of the old country, with imported Italian soaps, talk shows and soccer games. (Little hint--they call soccer "football!")
FOR: Immigrants, Italian students.
UNFORTUNATELY: The grease factor is through the roof.
253: TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER
DESCRIPTION: Old science fiction movies and television shows all day and all night (except for 1-7 AM, where you can order some of the finest kitchen and home fitness equipment on the market today!)
FOR: Losers, geeks tired of Techno-Time, nerds.
UNFORTUNATELY: The station was recently bought out by Viacom and there is talk of retooling it as a station centered around crops.
269: FASHIONABLE HOME DESIGNS
DESCRIPTION: See the latest in architecture, interior design and construction by touring some of the most fashionable houses in the northeast and west (no Midwest coverage for obvious reasons)
FOR: Families in bland cookie-cutter suburban wastelands (looking at you, Maple Street!) who want to live vicariously through those with taste.
UNFORTUNATELY: Though she comes across perfectly nice on TV, you just know leading personality Meredith Ireland is a raging b-i-t-c-h in real life, pardon our French.
280: FREEKY TV
DESCRIPTION: All the latest in rap and hip hop music, urban fashion and other gritty trends, YO! WORD UP!
FOR: Aspiring thugs/sluts, "wiggers."
UNFORTUNATELY: Poisons youth. Our advice is to place this one in between your Playboy TV, Showtime and VH1 on your "BLOCK ALL PROGRAMS" list.
