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ALLENBACH IN TWO-THOUSAND AND SEVEN
Dignity, Compassion, Furrowed Brow
Hiya everybody, it's me, beloved town mascot Monty, here with a STARTLING REVELATION...
As you all know, the events surrounding my death were foggy to say the least. After all, Thomas Allenbach says he ran over me with his beautiful Lincoln Navigator by accident, and that he swears it was an accident, but that's just a dirty lie. Accident. What is Mayor Allenbach hiding? Hiding.
I'll tell you what: James Walker killed me with his golf putter. My friendly, kind, and handsome master, Thomas Allenbach, was just doing his civic duty and COVERING UP for his fellow man. He knew that the town would take it easier if they thought it was just a mayoral mishap, rather than the violent outburst of a 14 handicap madman.
So there you have it: James Walker beat a dog to death with a golf club. It's on.
TIMOTHY ALLENBACH: I HAVE NEVER SLAUGHTERED AN ANIMAL WITH A PIECE OF SPORTING EQUIPMENT!
ALLENBACH IN TWO-THOUSAND AND SEVEN
Dignity, Compassion, Furrowed Brow
Hiya everybody, it's me, beloved town mascot Monty, here with a STARTLING REVELATION...
As you all know, the events surrounding my death were foggy to say the least. After all, Thomas Allenbach says he ran over me with his beautiful Lincoln Navigator by accident, and that he swears it was an accident, but that's just a dirty lie. Accident. What is Mayor Allenbach hiding? Hiding.
I'll tell you what: James Walker killed me with his golf putter. My friendly, kind, and handsome master, Thomas Allenbach, was just doing his civic duty and COVERING UP for his fellow man. He knew that the town would take it easier if they thought it was just a mayoral mishap, rather than the violent outburst of a 14 handicap madman.
So there you have it: James Walker beat a dog to death with a golf club. It's on.
TIMOTHY ALLENBACH: I HAVE NEVER SLAUGHTERED AN ANIMAL WITH A PIECE OF SPORTING EQUIPMENT!
